Solving Relationship Problems

Rows are not the right way to resolve conflicts - whether this is in a relationship, or work-based situation. You end up with 'winners' and 'losers' when you need more understanding of the other person's viewpoint in order to resolve the situation. This approach is used in counselling.

·         Decide who will be listener and who talks. Storyteller starts ‘I would like to tell you about …’

·         Listener repeats storyteller’s words as closely as possible, beginning with ‘What I hear you saying is …’ without asking questions, judging or changing anything he/she has heard.

·         Storyteller adds further descriptions of their emotions, without going off at a tangent. At each stage listener repeats the words, ending with ‘Was that what you said?’ until storyteller has finished.

·         Listener summarizes the whole story beginning with ‘The essence of what I’ve heard you say is …’ and ending with ‘Is this a good enough summary?’

·         Listener doesn’t have to agree, but should try to see through storyteller’s eyes, acknowledging they have understood by saying ‘When I see things from your perspective, I understand that …’

·         Listener empathizes with storyteller ‘I imagine this makes you feel ...’ and using 2 or 3 words that describe storyteller’s feelings. Storyteller adds any feelings not mentioned.

·         Both partners explain what each appreciates most about the other. Then the process is reversed on the same theme, with storyteller becoming the listener and vice versa.

Source: not recorded.

Folic Acid

Folate is one of the B vitamins. It is found in three forms: folic acid, folacin and vitamin B9.

Folates occur naturally in many foods, with dark green vegetables a good source.

Folic acid is essential for the body to make DNA, RNA and metabolise amino acids, which are required for cell division. Supplements are medically prescribed for the following reasons.

Low levels in early pregnancy are believed to be the cause of more than half of babies born with  neural tube defects. Women may take supplements and more than 80 countries fortify certain foods with folic acid as a precautionary measure.

Folic acid deficiency can cause anaemia. In children this may develop within one month of inadequate dietary intake.

Long term supplementation is associated with some reduction in the risk of stroke and cardiovascular disease. In 2018 it was reported that a new study suggested that a daily 800 microgram dose may significantly reduce the risk of stroke in people with high blood pressure.

Sources: Various

Do Good Lives Have to Cost the Earth?

Do good lives have to cost the earth?
Edited by Andrew Simms and Joe Smith. Constable. (ISBN: 978-1-84529-643-8)

Removal of ritual and regular partying from Western culture in the last 200 years may be a reason for our cultural boredom, anxiety and melancholy. Pleasure and fun may be basic needs, but don't have to cost a lot.

Sport is a form of organised, complex play. Early learning is done through play. But play totally oriented to outcomes (winning, losing) is no longer a game. The influence of money and power on sport is bad. Some sports will go - motorsport, alpine sports. [My note: Becomes ritualized tribal warfare?]

Currently we place too high a value on money, possessions, appearances (physical and social) and fame.

The present social security system is self-defeating and guarantees dependence for longer than people need. Choice is a great decider. Cut out choice and you cut out democracy. Monopolies limit choice by reducing or limiting competition.

Industrialization and urbanization initially bring pollution but rising prosperity demands that this is addressed. Rising prosperity has also resulted in the population explosion. 1800 population 1 billion. 2008 population 6.5 billion. 2050 expected population 9+ billion. Biodiversity is being eroded at an alarming rate.

Initially rising GDP makes people happier, but over certain level this relationship breaks down, so GDP is a poor measure of happiness. Population stabilization is crucial to long-term success in dealing with climate change and other global environmental impacts. Lower infant and child mortality, and longer life expectancy is good but needs to be balanced by lower conception rates. Close to a global rule that with high female literacy, modicum of economic growth and legal supply of contraceptives, fertility rates fall to (and usually below) replacement level.

Extremely low birth rates, sustained over the long term, would create problems. But rich, developed countries are quite capable of living with fertility rates slightly below 2 and a gently declining population. A rising proportion of older people in a population is manageable with sensible reforms of pensions systems and retirement ages in line with life expectancy.

The Hindu mystic Ramakrishna set out three fundamental attitudes: personal humility, respect for other sentient creatures, and a sense of reverence (for God).

We need to be self-reliant on food at a national level, then trade for items that can't be grown locally. This requires a significant labour force - ideally between 50% and 20%.

The Toyota Prius hybrid (petrol/electric) car uses ingenious technology but consumes more resources in manufacturing than conventional cars, and the batteries present significant disposal problems.

END